gaily traipsing

July 26, 2008 at 7:55 pm | Posted in writing | 19 Comments
Tags: , , ,

round the tower of babbling brook
lest we mention maypoles and

“Sir!”

Huh, oh no, looking up wearily from the banquet before him, don’t tell me it’s the Mo…

“No, Sir, there are Christians on the starboard bow. Their ship is sinking and they are begging permission to board whilst waving bloody crosses and howling about last minute redemption from the apocalypse.”

Involving still more suffering for someone no doubt. What is the point of such redemption? He bends over to pull on his pants. I told him, I said Jesus, mate, listen, don’t do it for me. I know your dad’s an old testament psychopath of the worst kind. I still can’t get over what he did to Abraham, the bastard, but don’t go getting yourself nailed up on my behalf. There’s gotta be a better way. Have you looked into redemption through hugging? Or what about redemption through the power of your ridiculous moustachios. But no, he was a stubborn bastard,

“Yes sir, but what do you want us to do?”

Let’s see, get all the ladies topdeck, serve champagne, play some dancing music, oh and make it clothing optional, that’ll drive ’em away. Haha, wake up my darling, I have planned a party, he said, bending down and whipping the sheet away,

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19 Comments »

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  1. oooo….subversive. And if this was music, which it kinda is in a sense, i’d put it on to get the party started. your blog *is* a party – Jesus is there, I bet Andy Warhol is somewhere in the corner recording Shakespeare…

    This would stand up to many a re-reading, and resonates profoundly with this ex-kindasorta-christian.

    Also at the start it kinda reminds me of The Wicker Man (1973 version thankyouverymuch.)
    which is no bad thing.

    so, awesome.
    Thankyouverymuch, too, my friend, and HAPPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (how’s the hangover? hahahahahahah,)

  2. LMAOWDAJ!!! Clapping even! And much kicking up of the heels! this sucked me in from the getgo and has me clamoring for more… please sir may i have more?
    Yes, but only if you tell me what WDAJ means, Lakota,

  3. Another round of applause, please. Wonderful usage of words to convey profound things in a humorous way and yet doing them justice. Brilliant. bravo!
    Thankyou Sumedh, and Bravo your photos too. The Garden is looking marvellous,

  4. The first two lines made me chuckle, as did the end. The writing imbetween is clever, quick and feisty. You have created something that tricks the eye in the language you use and makes your readers accept the unacceptable (ha! who says?), which is wonderful.
    and so are you, exceptionally so,

  5. oh this cracked me up. i love the beginning (waving bloody crosses) and the jesus conversation. the hugging part is hilarious. and in following up with strawberry comments, my thoughts transitioned to wondering if heaven is topless. like a nude beach or something. lots of strawberries i hope. i mean, real ones, what nevermind. lol.
    arragagaga, i had forgotten til then, Mrs Ott. oh well never mind,

  6. redemption through ((((((hugging))))))))????? Good one, g.
    Ahaha, got you, Gloria. I have been so well behaved in your comment box, but in this one there is no getting away (((((((((((((you)))))))))))))) hahahahaha,

  7. winsome comic fun that digs deep and finds a diamond
    thankyou, S.B.T. 31 made me laugh so hard I cried, you are amazing,

  8. *heh … loved this, Paul, wayy more like it than the broken glass alleged to reflect what always has to be a moveable feast in the best/worst of Times …

    the OT psychopath may have hung up his sacred spurs and handed reign to his female counterpart …

    but still, JC had quite the battle with his blood and ego, soul and whispers .. and that eternal passport was a torment for sure … is for all …

    and darn this cigarette ash in the k/b LOL

    loved this …
    cool, thankyou. Are you feeling better? You shouldn’t be smoking if you are still crook,

  9. OH MY… this is perhaps one of the funniest truisms I’ve ever read… If there were stronger words than “I absolutely love it”, now would be the time to use them!!! Thanks for this…
    you’re welcome. you rock,

  10. Thanks everybody. I was trying to avoid preaching to the converted by tagging, hoping there would be some tag surfers but not so far. It’s Sunday today though, so who knows,
    Let us experiment with redemption through hugging,
    ((((((((((((((((everybody))))))))))))))
    group hug, yayayayayaya,
    Who is this crazy idiot. What are you doing? Get out of my comment box!

  11. oh mr. squires you make me laugh so much i’m at loss of what to say. redemption through hugging, sent me over the edge and i think i’ll stay there because it is its own party.

    g’day.

    sarah
    g’day, how’s it going?

  12. you crack me up! hugs to you good sir!
    Hugs allround yayayayay

  13. 😀 Brrrilliant … Loved it. Sexual healing oyea !!
    oh yeah,

  14. Redemption through hugging? Love it. Not to mention – ‘there are Christians on the starboard bow’! He he he 🙂
    hello, Simonne. Congratulations on your new job and the first review was fantastic!

  15. lol. Disturbingly hilarious… great play on words! very interesting piece.
    Thankyou, your latest was wicked in a much smoother way, disturbing,

  16. It was said Jesus walked on water. Let us see how his followers fare eh? I tried to order some Turkey with no dressing at the Miss Universe pageant in Viet Nam and was thrown out of the hotel by Miss Turkey’s escort. I never even got to the cranberry sauce, how rude! Jerry Springer was the host, I expected nude mud wrestling and midgets at least.
    That sounds like fun, F.G., I’ll join you next year,

  17. Group hugs, parties and redemption – what more could anyone want? I love the pictures you paint in my head.
    Cool, you have painted some wild ones in my head too,

  18. WDAJ = while doing a jig. 😛
    Woohoo, a pirate jig on the topdeck, dancing, yayayayayayayayay

  19. you had me at “bloody crosses”


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