Some women are standing on the corner.

June 20, 2008 at 7:54 pm | Posted in writing | 24 Comments
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‘Tis a difficult subject on which to be discursive without betraying a certain, hmm, well let me just say that my monogamy has been serial and more a product of laziness than any moral compunction. Despite the quite necessary complexity of my speech (I am quite enamoured of delicacy, possessed of a tremendous respect for the exquisite precision of which the language is capable) I am a simple creature, a male human being and as such require little more than a full stomach and a soft place to devolve in order to be happy.

It rained this afternoon, a sudden storm gone almost before it arrived and now the sun is setting behind grandiloquent purple grey clouds. It is as if I am contained within a generosity of soft light. It is possible to love someone you can not touch when the world is so aligned. Are the gulls heralding morning there, my love? The sea, no doubt, seeks calm.

Language and light, both ways of being touched. I have never slept with a woman with whom I have not fallen in love. That is a simple sentence, like fingertips on a forearm, deliberate and smiling. Slept with, you see. Sex is quite random, dependant on availability but when waking up next to in the 2 am and feeling blessed by some eternal as if an angel has landed to take away all fears,

Long ago I was resigned and resolved to being a constructor of difficult sentences which could not slip by unfelt. I am aware that to be loved by me is an unneeded challenge.
When I was young I could not understand what a woman would want with this, the tugging why of it, but soon learned puppy dog eyes. Now I am older, raggedy and limping. The streetlights struggle in vain to overcome the night. There is the club in which I began my career, entertaining the strippers and the band. What a life. Miles Davis taught that there is a melancholy to love, a permanent yearning. Three legged dog was never as obvious as it appeared.

There is a gaggle of girls available on the corner, secretaries and receptionists. They are so young and the obviousness of my attempts to hide my easy money and my familiarity with the requisite understanding is really just a subtle exercise in revealing them. An aboriginal man is busking the didge. They know me, recognise my admiration for any culture in which the title ‘Aunty’ is the highest attainable.

I am walking home to write about women. It will not be my best work, my darling, but I hope you see in it that my love of the exquisite precision of which the language is capable is actually a longing, an aspiration. And that the light which has fled over the horizon while I was writing these Australian sentences is the same light which is now gracing your soft skin.

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24 Comments »

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  1. this is stunningly beautiful GingaPaul and slips beneath the skin, words tracing themselves like a lover’s touch across the mind… revealing much and hiding everything in between the lines. The journey of just understanding ourselves is an exquisite one; toss another being into the mix and it becomes a gordian knot.

    i do so love your love of the precision of language, and the way you can cast passionate storms, silly rainbows and comfortable breezy evenings with just a … touch.
    ~scratching the three legged dog behind the ear~
    Thankyou, Lakota, that is a perfectly beautiful piece of writing too, your comment. Woof…

  2. I just wanted to let you know that I absolutely love your writing. It’s beautiful and inspirational and I look forward every day to reading something new.

    I’m fortunate that I stumbled upon your site.

    Thank You.
    Thankyou so much for leaving this comment. I really appreciate it. It was perfectly timed too, I was starting to tire but a comment like this is truely inspirational and very moving in a way. Thankyou.

  3. Even the structure of this, along with the careful, whispered words, is reason why it would be possible for words to contain more than the thought – for love to be possible without touch. A true emotion should be conveyed with the eyes but then there are moments where you view art and that emotion soaks into the deepest recesses of the viewer’s heart and soul. That is the magic you so crave and seem to so effortlessly achieve. I believe that is because of you rather than any craft you have mastered. I believe that is because there is a carefully veiled transparency, which is so alluring to all who read you.

    There’s an ‘anonymous’ above this comment… I wish that more anonymous’ would declare themselves, even if it’s just to say ‘fab stuff’ or suchlike, because there is no greater compliment than someone strolling along, expecting a normal day of nothing much, when all of a sudden they find something to make them catch their breath.
    Thankyou, Mary P. Your comments are always so insightful, I read them carefully and there is direction in them, thankyou,

  4. i love the new, more personal pieces you seem to be writing. well, they might not be about you per say but the details are so intimate that it seems confessional. i love that line “is it possible to love someone you cannot touch when the world is so aligned.” great, great job, paul.
    Ahh, Lissa!, thankyou. You know better than anyone, I suspect, as a result of your incredible skill with the language how complex the question is. Fiction, truth, revelation, it is a dance. My respect for your writing makes your comments so precious. Thankyou.

  5. Anything I could dream of saying in a comment would hardly begin to describe how thoroughly I enjoy your work. Thank you for sharing, you are absolutely brilliant.
    Thankyou, that is a wonderful comment,

  6. about the women. that’s make a great title of a book, wouldn’t it? 😛
    It would. How are you today, Aefiel, let me go have a look.

  7. I know that 2 AM feeling of feeling blessed by some eternal as if an angel has landed to take away all fears…it is what I miss every time I am single.

    Thank you as always for the imagery and thank you for painting women with a softer lense than some of us portray in real life. 🙂

  8. I have to tell you this Paul….I like your writing, I love the honesty and the nonchalance of it rolled up all together.
    Take you as you are indeed.

  9. This is whisper perfect…I love it.

  10. ohhh my …

    “It is possible to love someone you can not touch when the world is so aligned. Are the gulls heralding morning there, my love? The sea, no doubt, seeks calm.”

    how very yes, yes, yes to this … always …

    darn it, should i be so melted by the tones here? all the way, so to speak? So very sensual, so very “how did you do that?”

    i adore your writing …

  11. Beautifully written. I like the idea of being able to love someone who’s distant from me physically. The whole idea of time is not linear comes into play.

  12. Such lovely words make it impossible speak. To do so would be to pierce something fragile. You are a lovely man, do you know that?

  13. i feel i’ve discovered a new, beautiful voice.
    sarah

  14. Thankyou, everybody. You are very kind.

  15. oh, sigh…… gotta agree w/lissa.. that line sez it all.. it’s the distance that makes it real… im missing you as soon as you’re gone… not so much when yr here… the mention of streetlights overcoming the dark… miles davis horn blowing the way.. colorful random thoughts passing by as you consider… there is a gaggle of girls..is really just a subtle exercise in revealing them thought was a curious mention… hidden between the easiness of humor.. or did i misread.. but please do continue to write abt women.. it is always so enlightening to read men’s thoughts abt women.. so rare does the door open…

  16. Beautiful, stunning, love it!!!

    “my monogamy has been serial and more a product of laziness than any moral compunction”

    I agree…

    Three legged dog might be an oft used male strategy, not to say it doesn’t work 🙂 …

    “Long ago I was resigned and resolved to being a constructor of difficult sentences which could not slip by unfelt”

    May you never stop!!.

  17. […] (at my age) […]

  18. Glad to read this one again. I found entirely new aspects to it. Wonderful writing.

  19. this work is exceptional Paul. not one strand of imperfection, not one bump in the rhythm, the content. its jewellery,

  20. i think this one may have to go into the chapbook even tho it is long…it is so lovely and says so much

  21. I can not possibly say anything that has not already been said
    and i find the honesty you write with to be quite striking.
    In that you write about the deed and the man, love and sex are
    not as connected for the male mind (as it is my understanding)
    of course there are many variables to this ideal. But as I woman
    I can say that we are (most of us) connected by our soul to the
    act and to the love of a man. This is not to say that woman do not
    cheat or have casual sex once in a while> again there are many
    variables~ but I do believe that a woman generally connects the two.
    I very much enjoy your writings.

  22. “I am aware that to be loved by me is an unneeded challenge.”
    me, too.

  23. Always has been one of my favourites.

  24. So very thoughtful and full of love. Thanks.


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