bedtime pastorale
May 26, 2008 at 7:20 pm | Posted in poetry, writing | 14 CommentsTags: poetry, writing
they call it a knowing smile
and i am a victim of it
a poor slow beast, drawn,
predicted, already read by a
far quicker and more responsive
flicker forward into her reward
led once more down a garden path
into a verdant dream of thighs and sighs
then released into vacant sleep
as she reaches for her reading glasses.
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Ah men and their sweet naivety 🙂 This is great Paul.
Comment by Simonne— May 26, 2008 #
less than worshipping, more than admiration…
not too far from defiance, not too close to surrender…
Comment by hayat— May 26, 2008 #
~laughing!!~
so funny, so clever.
Garden paths can be fun, especially if they’re the wild, untamed ones. No prissy british gardens if you please. Give me the mock forests with wild flowers run amok. ~still laughing~
Comment by Lakota— May 26, 2008 #
I wonder what she would be reading?
He creeps on tiptoes to his reward, leaving him sated, so I believe he is a willing victim, haha. Clever subtle rhyme, fantastic sounds as you read it aloud.
Might we hear more of these two?
Comment by MaryP— May 27, 2008 #
Playful internal rhyming with a hilarious, but alas common, ending. At least she didn’t start off with a headache.
Comment by Writer Reading— May 27, 2008 #
great images & rhythm. clever & fantastic, as usual.
Comment by lissa— May 27, 2008 #
The title is wonderful. I imagine the narrator found what the smile promised, and then fell into sleep. It meant more to him than the woman, who unpoetically reached for her book. What remains unsaid is as powerful as what is spoken.
Comment by mariacristina— May 27, 2008 #
“I wonder what she would be reading?”
GingaTao poems OF COURSE.
~and yes, still laughing~
Comment by Lakota— May 27, 2008 #
why thankyou, that is a rain of comments like snowflakes in the spring,
Comment by Paul— May 27, 2008 #
how very poetic 🙂
why, thankyou,
Comment by Disturbed Stranger— May 27, 2008 #
that’s what I call a knockout
BAM!
Comment by ozymandiaz— May 27, 2008 #
it is all so simple and divine… what no cigarette… who sed it’s whambamthankumam… tho it was lovely gesture shared after a long summer day …
Comment by pieceofpie— May 30, 2008 #
“a verdant dream of thighs and sighs”
What a great line.
Comment by Peter— May 30, 2008 #
Love your choice of ending….amazing
“as she reaches for her reading glasses”
Comment by ngetha— June 12, 2008 #