yohoho

May 21, 2008 at 6:58 pm | Posted in poetry, writing | 11 Comments
Tags: ,

somewhere a rope breaks,
’tis a simple case of transportation
strange apparatus slipping chains
and someone’s lowered a galleon from the gantry
and with footlights conjured dancing mantas
reflected on the moonslicked surface

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11 Comments »

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  1. a simple case of trans+portation indeed 😀 This is smooth, like that moonslicked surface;

  2. What a lovely image, the dancing mantas reflected on the moonslicked surface.

  3. clever & like always, very cool.

  4. a wee seafaring shantee, eh?

  5. i envision neil armstrong skating on the moon’s slick surface wishing you’d been his copywriter…

  6. Exquisite. The sound and movement in this are so subtly effective that it would be easy to sit back and just absorb them without ever questioning how come it works so well. The lights are a masterstroke from the darker beginning, the gentle change in sound, etc.

    It is rare that I read something so complete, in such a few lines, without a single compromise anywhere.

    I look forward to reading more!

  7. oh my, i cannot help but to consider sailin and the scent of the sea… it has been a pleasant visit… thanks for stoppin by w/comments a few days back…

  8. love the word ” moonslicked. Creates a mystery of nightime pirates. Intriguing to start out with somewhere, almost as if we were watching a scene in a play, or entering someone else’s dream. Great stuff.

  9. Yes, just like an old fashioned play with the stage devices and I particularly like the punctuation, ‘ as the rope breaks and then smooth sailing from there.
    Clever and effective poem.

  10. I read it as moons licked. That works great too!

  11. someone is percolating honey again through the alembics in the palms of his soul 🙂


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