stumbling into haikus,

September 18, 2008 at 6:11 pm | Posted in antihaiku, writing | 12 Comments
Tags: writing, writing for fun

who, haha, drunken master style,
some antihaiku drum solo
Takeshi Kitano style
someone has to expend energy and someone has to receive it
and somewhere cracks a whip
otherwise yeh dead son
roe your boat home
stumbling into haikus
and scaring flocks of birds a’flyin’
leda abandoned into zeus

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Your writing is very unusual and original!
Thanks Nick, that is the highest compliment I can imagine especially coming from an artist like yourself, creative imaginative and tremendous craft which I greatly respect.

Comment by Art and Poetry— September 18, 2008 #
Leda- wasn’t she the mother of Helen and Castor?

I seem to remember something about a swan. Could be wrong.

Quite a dark piece.
Hello again, Crushed. Long time no see. There was a swan indeed,

Comment by Crushed— September 18, 2008 #
global flight today, eh, paul?

“leda abandoned into zeus”: i have always wondered about leda–raped? seduced? entranced? i imagine she would want to, to know, to feel, to have that experience. so i am puzzling your last line–who did the abandoning? her culture? did leda abandon herself? was she with him with abandon–without fear?

i will contemplate more on the other lines leading up to this one…and read others responses!
Yes, I thought hard about the balance in the last line, decided on abandoned into, don’t spend too much time contemplating,

Comment by artpredator— September 19, 2008 #
drunken master style

I wish I could do that…
Haha me too,

Comment by Queen of the Universe— September 19, 2008 #
unique poetic images/words of woven volumes and color who contain both new and known worlds, amazing
you are amazing, Tipota, thankyou,

Comment by tipota— September 19, 2008 #
i love it when you add the greeks into the mix. i love the tap or rhythm of the poem. the beginning is especially noteworthy. excellent!
Cool, thanks Mrs Ott. I’ll see if I can whack a few more ancients in as we go along,

Comment by mrs. sarah ott— September 19, 2008 #
I am slightly discombobulated by the last line I think (ha!) but I’m not sure. It seems to change the tone from what seemed a stomping romp but, of course, that is probably the point. Curiouser and curiouser, which is always fun.
Yes this last line is deliberately discombobulating as I said I worked it and tricked it into balance. It is not a friendly or loving or affectionate poem, it is an anti-haiku after all. There is a whip cracked, power exchanged, people talk of The Rape of Leda but the original story is far more complex. I think this poem follows on from the discussion about consent and manipulation in a few of the previous pieces.

Comment by Mary P— September 19, 2008 #
I like the idfea of an antihaiku drum solo, and as for stumbling ito haikus I’m always doing that

Comment by Crafty Green Poet— September 19, 2008 #
apparently, haikus are in the air this month. come stumble into mine, there, sailor.

Comment by jason— September 20, 2008 #
The eternal predator and the eternal victim? I am always guessing here, not that I complain …

Comment by Mental Mist— September 21, 2008 #
Strong message..I can hear it.I can see it..Do you know what you reveal? I think you do. I appreciate your wording. I understand this very much.

Comment by nectarfizz— September 23, 2008 #
[...] the old mans hands keep dancing this way Leda that way Zeus, It’s not enough to conquer one must also seduce, Posted by Paul Filed in [...]

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